5 Topics to Impress Her on a First Date

scarlett johannson

It’s often hard to come up with stuff to talk about on a first date. You don’t want to come off as too self-centered by telling her your whole life story, yet you are putting on a presentation in an attempt to sell her on why you’re the best choice for her. Subtly curate your conversation and, if all else goes well, you should be well on your way to that all-important second date. Here are 5 topics to impress her on a first date.

 

Your Charity Work

If you don’t do any charity work, then start. Even if you simply help update the Facebook page for your local animal shelter, find a few hours each month to devote to being the good guy. Even if you’re doing it just to appeal to girls, a lot of charitable organizations need all the help they can get, and who knows, you might even start to like helping others.

 

Your Investment Portfolio

This topic is tricky. Gordon Gekko’s “greed is good” mentality might work in the boardroom, but it can easily appear garish on a first date. The trick is to touch on the idea that you have several successful investments without making it seem as though you are trying to impress her with your overwhelming wealth. The best method is to pick one humble element of how you arrived at your riches, and focus on that. “It’s crazy! I had to save up like four paychecks for some Google stock in college…”

 

boys who play guitarYour Super Sexy Hobby

Danger sports such as rock climbing or kite surfing are impressive because they show that you’re bold, healthy, and full of adrenaline. Women are hard-wired to be attracted to an abundance of energy coupled with a lack of fear — signs you’re a good hunter and protector.

 

abs vs nerdYour Expertise

Intelligence is sexy, and it’s impressive to be well-versed on a topic such as 18th Century literature, string theory, classic cars, or Reagan-era politics. Just be extra careful not to come off as superior, or a pedant. She’s only going to be impressed with your knowledge on a certain topic if you possess more of it than she does, but she’s going to be largely turned off if you quiz her or make her feel stupid.

 

How Much You Love Your Family

Women are nesters by nature. They will always be impressed by how you visit your elderly grandmother every Tuesday no matter how busy you are, how you still mow your mother’s lawn every week even though she insists on paying someone to do it, or how you surprised your little sister with a trip to the Galapagos to learn about Darwin. It not only says you’re kind and empathetic, but showing her that you are focused on family tells her you’ll be good mating material.

 

5 Reasons To Be Single This Summer

Better To Be Single Or In A Relationship Over The Summer?

Summer is such a fun time of year, with lots of outdoor activities and social get-togethers. Hanging out at the beach or the lake is enjoyable, whether you’re single or in a relationship. So which is better? Here are a few reasons that being single during the summer can be a good thing.

 

travel the worldPlan Your Own Vacation

This is a big one. For your summer vacation, you can do anything you want, without having to work around somebody else. If you really want to go ride elephants in Thailand, and his idea of adventure is camping by the lake, that can lead to a compromise that neither of you are really happy with. When you’re single, you can plan whatever vacation you want, and do the things you’re dreaming of. Whether you like to plan a big, exotic vacation, or just have the freedom to take off at a moment’s notice for a long weekend getaway, your options are open. Go ahead, and take advantage of this while you can!

 

alohaLong, Leisurely Days

In the summer, when you get off work for the day, you still have hours of daylight left to spend as you wish. It seems like you have more time available to do the things you love, or to try new things as well. Whether your interests run more to photography, canyoneering, or happy hours, there is plenty of time to indulge in the things you love to do. When you spend more time doing your favorite activities, you’ll probably even meet new people along the way, with similar interests to you.

 

pillows bedThe Sheets Stay Cooler

During the winter, it’s cozy and warm having somebody to snuggle with under the blankets. Body heat is a good thing, then. In the summertime, that’s not much of an advantage – quite the opposite. This time of year, body heat can make you sweaty and hot. During the summer, you’ll be more comfortable sleeping on clean, cool sheets, without that additional warmth radiating from a nearby body.

 

Solo People Watching

Try going to the beach and watching the couples who are trying to act romantic. It’s an eye-opener that will leave you glad that you’re at the beach solo, or with a group of friends. Face it, beaches just aren’t very conducive to romance, and it’a bad choice of venue for a date. Cuddling in the sand can be downright uncomfortable, and falling asleep on the towels with your arms around each other makes for some absurd tan lines. You can also try to identify new couples, by watching whether they’re still sucking in their tummies to try to show their best look to each other. While a beach date isn’t the best thing for them, it can make great entertainment for you and your friends.

 

have a summer flingYou’re Free For a Summer Fling

Obviously, you don’t need to have a guy around to enjoy an amazing summer. But being single means that if you happen to meet a good-looking guy at the beach (or riding elephants in Thailand), you are free to have a fling if you want to. It’s as easy as making a profile on  www.fling.me and meeting other people looking for their summer fling.

Best Summer First Date Ideas

First dates are tricky, because you’re not only setting the stage for your first encounter, you’re telling your date a lot about yourself. Dinner and a movie is an old favorite, but it doesn’t show much creativity. An impressive first date idea puts you in control of the next move, because it leaves them wanting more.

 

1. Take a Winery Tourwine tasting

If you’re fortunate enough to live near a winery, book a car service to pick you and your date up, and take you back home. A quick web search can reveal many discount tour packages, and the same goes for the car service. Driving after sampling a few glasses of the vino is a big no-no, but paying for a car service shows you are both responsible and successful.

 

2. BYOB Painting Class

Hour or two hour-long classes are offered in almost every region of the country these days, and if one doesn’t exist in your area, call ahead and ask the instructor if there’s an adults-only art class where they wouldn’t mind you bringing a bottle or two. If the instructor gives you the green light, make sure you bring enough inexpensive bottles and plastic flutes for the whole class, and the instructor, to have a glass.

 

camping fire3. Go Camping

Book a campsite for a favorable time of year in advance and then invite your crush along. This one requires a bit of advance planning, however. Make sure the campsite offers amenities such as a shower and possibly even electricity. Bring along everything for a romantic rustic dinner and an evening fire. Mostly importantly: bring two tents and two sleeping bags. Presuming they’re going to sleep in your tent is rude enough to be a deal breaker.

 

4. Get Tickets for a Sporting Event

This idea works for both genders, even girls who aren’t sports fans. A girl who volunteers to get tickets to a sporting event shows she can be one of the guys. Both girls and guys will want to choose a sport such as hockey, basketball, or soccer, though. If the sparks aren’t there after 90 minutes with someone, the public setting gives you a perfect opportunity to cut and run.

 

5. Cooking Class

Men who can cook are an instant turn on, and the way to a man’s heart often really is through his stomach. Food, which ignites all of one’s senses, can always be a sexy cooking couple experience, so turn up the flames with a cooking class taught by a professional. Surf the Web for a culinary school or community college which offers a nighttime course without too much commitment.  If the date doesn’t whet your appetite by the end of the night, at least you learned a thing or two about cooking, and for that, your own appetite will thank you.

 

How To Make A Woman Want You

woman seducingIf the animal instinct has already set in and your eye contact tells you there’s a chance she wants you, your next move is to strategize your attack. It’s also time to play a little offensive defense: as successful as your fight plan may be, you’re going to have to pull off a few stealth moves that have her helping in her own defeat.

 

Keep the Upper Hand

If she’s a seven, you need to be an 8.5. If she’s better looking, make sure you come off as more successful. If she’s a stellar athlete, or a dancer, make sure she knows you’re renowned in your particular section of the business world. Everyone always wants to ‘date up,’ make sure she knows you’re a challenge for her.

 

Thwart Biology

Taller men are biologically more appealing to women, but if you don’t happen to have a height advantage, then take advantage of your other big muscle: your brain. Always have good posture, a classy walk, and deliberate movements. Always have unwavering eye contact, remain unaffected by trivial events, and be witty and intelligent. All of these qualities are surprisingly attractive to women, so what you lack in brawn, you can make up for in brainpower.

 

Be Unavailable

No matter how sophisticated she is, having to pursue you will drive her crazy (in a good way). Women are used to being pursued, not the other way around, so making her work for her time with you will always leave her wanting more. She will never get bored with the chase because it keeps her too busy. Don’t be an absentee lover, however. If she’s highly desirable, there inevitably will be more suitors out there, and you don’t want to lose your edge on the competition.

 

Stay Out of the Friend Zone

Make it clear that the only acceptable relationship for the two of you is a romantic one, just don’t be crass about it. You want to be friends of course, but you’re looking for a seriously intense romance, too. Make that proposition appealing, or you’re going to end up solidly in the dreaded ‘friend zone,’ which is incredibly hard to come back from.

 

Be the Good Guy

At the end of the day, she still wants you to take care of her. You sometimes want to seem aloof in your relationship, but if she thinks you don’t care if she sees other guys, she probably will. You still have to be protective: be her hero. Don’t forget it’s still pretty fair to call dating a ‘game.’ Too much bluffing without a few genuinely good hands will leave you bust.

 

How To Make A Man Fall In Love

cupid shot with arrowOnce you’ve met the man you know you want — you really want — it’s time to solidify it. Proceed with care, though. A ham-handed attempt to be the ‘perfect’ girl for him and make him love you will be as transparent (and ineffective) as that cheesy lace negligee you spent way too much on.

 

Don’t be Delusional

You can’t make a man fall in love with you, and truth be told, you really don’t want to. Yes, you’re smitten with each other, but the love you seek is the kind that happens naturally. It’s that kind of love that can only come via a true bond: a connection that develops automatically because you’re just right for each other. You certainly can, however, take steps to create an atmosphere that will nurture rather than hinder the bond of being in love.

 

Be Happy

No one wants to be around a sad or angry girl. You have to start out happy with yourself before you can make someone else happy. If your career is in shambles, work hard to get out of that rut. If you have a problem with drugs or alcohol, get real, professional support. If you’re unhappy with the way you look, get your hair done, join a gym, or surround yourself with hip people from whom you can learn some fashion tips.

 

skunks flirting blushingBe Mysterious

No matter how much he says he does, he doesn’t want to know everything about you — or your day. Don’t make him suspicious or jealous, and don’t disappear for long periods of time, but do be allusive sometimes. Don’t text, call and visit him incessantly; always be the one who ends the conversation before he gets bored.

 

Be Interesting

Read, watch, and then read some more. Read about sports, watch Star Trek and Star Wars, and learn how to shoot a three-pointer without concern for your acrylics. As much as women do, men looking to settle down look for a partner who will be their equal. Men want to solve problems for you, but will be impressed that you are independent enough to fix something yourself or can hang in a conversation about something other than your new Louboutins.

 

Be Patient

Falling in love is rarely instantaneous. And even if it is, the dangerous speed of a whirlwind romance is bound to create tension. Once you both realize you are falling in love, your brains will reel from the stress of all this new pressure and you’ll get into arguments over nothing. Both of your fight or flight instincts will kick in — make sure you’re being patient, fair and understanding enough to recognize this and keep him from fleeing.

 

5 Foods Girls Shouldn’t Order on a First Date

bad girl dinnerOn a first date, first impressions are everything. You might think your breath is the only thing you need to worry about while perusing the menu, but think again. What you order on a first date can say a lot about you, and will either get your relationship cooking, or leave him with a bad taste in his mouth.

 

Onions, Garlic and Curry, Oh My!

So garlic is a bad idea all around if you’re expecting a sexy goodnight kiss. However, there are many more foods which cause bawdy breath due to a high sulfur content, such as salsa, and foods which contain curry. Avoid the sulfurs and he won’t suffer through a steamy goodbye.

 

No Needs for Utensils, Thanks

Ribs, chicken wings and pulled pork are not only sloppy and unattractive to eat, but the meats get stuck in your teeth, which could put an embarrassing situation on your hands. Nothing is as uncouth as a woman picking her teeth, even if it’s with a toothpick. (If you do find yourself with something stuck in your teeth, make sure you excuse yourself to the restroom, and do a breath check while you’re at it.) Not eating with your hands is a good first date rule-of-thumb.

 

I’m Secretly a Rabbit!

Contrary to popular girl belief, men know you eat. They know you eat food, and they know you eat at least an acceptable amount of various foods. (If he thinks you habitually starve yourself and still asked you out, you’ve got bigger problems than having a steak in front of him.) Don’t be pretentious and order a salad just to appear super fit or dainty. You’ll have to end your charade eventually, and if the date is going to last (especially if until morning) you’re going to need some protein to keep from getting cranky.

 

I Only Eat Lobster, Thanks

Never, ever, ask about the cost of something you’re ordering or express any concern about prices, especially if they’re not on the menu. Worrying about the price of your meal will make him feel self-conscious, as though you don’t think he can swing it. Worse yet, it will seem as though you’re not used to the best, which can lose you some respect. However, good manners would prevent you from going to the other end of the spectrum and ordering the most expensive thing on the menu, such as the filet mignon or the lobster, unless he first offers the suggestion for you both.

 

Thanksgiving is a Snooze!

Foods high in tryptophan, and foods which boost the brain’s release of serotonin, mixed with foods high in carbs cause serious sleepiness, especially if eaten within four hours of bedtime. Potatoes, bread, rice, tofu, and poultry such as turkey or chicken can contribute to a calming combo of sleep-aiding brain chemicals. So, if you want to avoid becoming a bore halfway through your date, avoid the potato-poultry duos. While you’re at it, avoid red wine or [YAWN] too many cocktails, which could also have you calling it quits when he’s just getting going.

 

Top 5 Things She Wants To Hear

complimenting womenDon’t cringe just yet, there are a few tried and tested survival tactics when forging through the forest of figuring out things she wants to hear. You’ve made the all-important first step towards bonding with her simply by considering what she wants to hear and what she doesn’t. Just bear in mind that every person is different: never expect every method to work 100 percent of the time.

 

“How Was Your Day?”

Yes, you are wincing at the thought of it. But, don’t even bother trying to get out of it — you’re going to have to ask her this every day. She might rant for hours about stuff you could care less about. She might say simply: “It was OK. Same old. What do you want for dinner?” If you’re not lucky enough for the latter, tough it out. If that sounds unbearable, try revising the question to “What’s the most interesting thing that happened to you today?” You might get an entertaining story rather than how her bitchy work friend pissed her off over some girl stuff when she something something something.

 

“You Look Beautiful/Sexy/Pretty”

Often this is said sufficiently enough with a knowing glance, and a little grab and a sweet kiss, but make sure you say it too. Women can’t hear often enough how beautiful they are. Figure out creative ways to inject it into new situations. When introducing her to someone new say “and this is the stunning Eleanor,” or pencil the words “You are beautiful” in the margin of the book she’s reading a good 10 pages ahead of where her bookmark is.

 

How Do You Feel About [Something]

Consulting her on anything is a good idea, be it business, your proposed new diet, or what she thinks about some recent political scandal. She needs to know you respect her enough to care about her opinion on everything.

 

“I Love You”

Rule Number One of dropping the L-bomb: Don’t say it if you don’t mean it. You WILL break her heart when it becomes clear it was only pillow talk. Rule Number Two: Even when you do mean it, don’t say it too soon. Use some restraint. She will perceive it, and it will make the moment when you do say “I Love You” all the more meaningful and emotional.

 

“You’re My Best Friend”

Telling her she’s your best friend is hands down the most important and flattering thing you could ever say to someone you’re in a romantic relationship with. Just make sure you mean it. Be careful though. It has to come after the L-word, or she’ll feel like she’s in friend-ville, or worse, she’s a friend-with-benefits.

5 Tips to Separate Him From His Pack

guys at the barHumans will always be social animals, but if you’re out there and you’ve set your sight on one particular example of the male species, your chances are way better if you can get him on his own. You’ve worked hard on your game, but it likely only works one-on-one. If you get him flying solo, you also won’t run the risk of a wingman running interference, or competition from a rival female. Keep a few tips in mind and you’ll be two-to-tango in no time.

 

Carry a Spare

If you are out with a close girlfriend, counteract his wingman’s interference with your own wing-girl. Just make sure she knows in advance that you’re pawning her off on the friend, or you’re going to get some serious bitching-out over text the next morning.

 

wing waitress

Have A Wing Girl

If you’re not out with a wing-girl, don’t be too shy to radio in for help. If you can call in the Thelma to your Louise — i.e. another hot chick who can keep his friend(s) busy — you’re golden. Hell, she might thank you for it later. That, or she’ll never speak to you again. Make sure the risk is worth it.

 

 

Abscond With Him

You might not want to invite him straight into your locker room, but you will score a few points by getting him off the gridiron and onto a neutral playing field. If you can escape the meat market and get him into a bar where you know the bartender, a club which you like but he has never been to, or a venue where he feels slightly off-guard — such as an art show opening — you’ll be able to take the upper hand. Try a rouse such as “I left my wallet somewhere, will you help me find it?”

 

All’s Fair in Love and War

If all else fails and you can’t seem to get him away from his pack, a little light flirting with his friends will excite that part of the male psyche which forces them to win a female’s attention over other males. Pitting them against each other should be done with caution, however. You don’t want to start a war which results in a fist fight, just get them mentally competing against each other. Eventually make your favorite clear, and the others should soon back away. It’s somewhere in the Bro Code, allegedly.

 

Just Ask

Don’t under-estimate simply asking his friend (or friends) to make scarce. Make sure you do it in Stealth Mode, however. He doesn’t even know you’re interested in him — yet. He doesn’t want to feel Cougared. Wait until his friend goes to the bathroom and catch him before he returns. There aren’t too many guy friends who wouldn’t hastily invent some excuse to rush out early after you lay all your cards on the table, and reveal your sneaky plan to get his friend all to yourself. If you play your cards right, the next morning, your crush will thank his buddies for it.

 

How to Make Him Chase You

chasing girl

Playing hard-to-get might seem like the obvious route to get him to chase you. Perhaps it is obvious — but it’s also still important. It is not, however, the only move you need to get him on the offensive.

 

Let Him Make the First Move

If you see him out at the supermarket, notice with a smile but keep pushing your cart along. If he’s making eyes at you from across the bar, return them, but never get up first. Even if he motions you over, give him the friendly ‘yeah right’ smile, and wait. The one who makes the first move loses — don’t let it be you.

 

Get a Life

Even if the hottest fling in the world erupts between the two of you, don’t go all in. Make sure you have a life: a good job that you care about, hobbies that are fun and productive and which make you happy, and above all else, be interesting. He not going to chase someone who bores, or scares him, so make sure you keep the vast majority of that free time to yourself.

 

Play Hard-to-Get

Don’t answer on the first ring every time, or respond to every text immediately. If he sets a date, break it a respectable amount of time in advance — but do it politely, don’t just no-show.

 

Flirt

The major danger in hard-to-get is taking it too far. You can’t be unattainable or you risk him giving up. Make sure you’re flirtatious, but not creepy. Keep it cute and not cliché: instead of texting him sexy comments, try finding him in person (not at work), and bringing him your favorite book. You then have an excuse to follow-up with him later.

 

Show Him Other Guys Want You

The male psyche has a built in mechanism to win you over from other males. Flirting with another guy in front of him will excite this part of his brain, and drive him to action. Just don’t take it too far, or he will actually think you’re taken and back off in fear of stepping on another bro’s toes.

chasing woman beach buoy boys

5 Tips for Meeting Someone at the Gym

flirting at the gymThe gym can be one of the best places to meet someone: not only are you sure they care about their appearance and health as much as you do, but workout gears usually ensures you get a little sneak peek at the physical goods before you get too far down the dating road. Tread lightly, however. Some gym people are strictly there for a work out.

 

Don’t be ‘That Guy’

The worst guy at the gym is the one who’s there to pick up women. Although there are plenty of girls who want to be picked up while working out, it’s a mistake to assume most women want to be hit on in that situation. There’s a certain vulnerability to huffing through an hour treadmill jog in tight and revealing spandex, sans make-up, so don’t go on a balls out attack or you’ll only get defense in return.

 

Work on Your Rep[s]

Make sure you’re a healthy presence in the gym. If you’re going to offer to ‘spot’ someone on the bench press, you need to be two things: obviously physically fit enough to do so, and trusted by the gym staff and other gym-users. The last thing you want is for her to notice nervous glances or an eye roll from other gym folk when you offer to help.

 

Make Friends

One of the best ice breakers is the simple act of knowing someone’s name or even occupation before you meet them. It shows that you liked them enough to invest the time in asking about them. Just don’t get too stalker-y by pumping everyone in the gym for information or you’ll really creep them out. Becoming friends with the gym staff and patrons will help in your future conquests.

 

Practice Good Hygiene

If that workout god or goddess on whom you have had your eye sees you walk away from a machine without wiping it down, you’re sunk. Still worse, the last thing you want is the reputation for being ‘that smelly guy.’ Sweating at the gym is attractive; being stinky, well, just stinks.

 

Get Game

“‘Can You Spot Me?’ ‘Do You Know How This Machine Works?’ and ‘I Like Your Outfit’” are all legitimate ice breakers, but don’t rely on them. The best first impressions will happen naturally, and if she’s not interested in meeting people at the gym, the MP3 player likely won’t come off the whole time, so take the hint and don’t force it.